A while back, I happened to catch a Dr. Oz show. Don’t worry, I’m not a regular viewer–I tend only to watch shows that go well with wine like Madmen, or the Daily Show or the Muppets… But by the end of the show I was hurling my wine glass at the TV and cursing like a trucker.
Why? Well, you see, Dr. Oz did an entire show on adult onset ADHD. “ADHD can cause forgetfulness, irritability and procrastination, all of which can put a healthy marriage at risk. In fact, adults with ADHD are twice as likely to get divorced.”
Dr. Oz Website
The “specialist” he had on talked about it being really common in women in their 30s and 40s after pushing out a few kids–ARE YOU KIDDING ME???
For those of you who don’t have kids, ahem, let me take a moment to explain…
Imagine you become head chef at a restaurant. Except that you’ve maybe only made grilled cheese all your life. You’re expected to push out lovingly prepared, deliciously perfect meals 14-18 hours a day. You manage a nice but entirely unreliable and unpredictable staff member of one, who contributes occasionally but also spends an inordinate amount of time practicing his golf swing in the kitchen, surfing online and generally being disinterested in cooking or any prep.
While you are trying to cook, there are out of control mice running around the kitchen. Only these mice can talk, and demand, and sometimes argue with each other or with you. And as mice, they tend to leave crap everywhere.
Did I mention you also manage the business end of the restaurant? Paying bills, taking reservations, ensuring your guests are happy. You’re also responsible for co-ordinating extra curricular activities for those pesky talking mice (who do occasionally demonstrate gratitude for a roof over their head and food in their bellies, but it’s rare).
Embed from Getty Images
But that’s not all…you’re also the cleaner when the restaurant is closed for a few brief hours and the mice finally go to sleep. Sweeping, mopping washing lots and lots of soiled linens.
And if you’re a new “head chef?” You’re doing all of this on a couple of hours of interrupted, Guantanamo-prison style sleep.
More experienced chefs, may even try and take on some outside catering work. Partly for the extra money and partly because the mice never really seem to stop running around and crapping everywhere. So outside catering becomes a bit of restaurant respite…
And that folks, is what being a mother of young kids can be like…
So when Dr. Oz asks, “”Are you or your spouse constantly distracted or forgetful? Do either of you feel as if you can’t get anything done?” the answer is F@#K YES! It’s called “TRDOMMs” The Ridiculous Demands of Modern Moms not ADHD!
Note: No mice were harmed in the making of this blog post.